Walter Skinner wasn't thinking about sex when he saw Alex Krycek coming toward the frozen food section. He was thinking of dinner, finding a steak and getting home after a long day at work. Seeing Krycek this way, away from work, he was struck again by how sexy he was, even in that awful suit. At least the hair gel was wearing off, his hair falling onto his forehead . . .
Skinner sighed and shook himself mentally. He shouldn't be thinking of one of his agents that way. Especially in light of how deep he was getting himself involved in that cigarette smoking bastard's dealings. It made him feel jaded and dirty and so old to think of all the compromises he'd made, the things he'd covered up.
He almost winced, thinking of how eager Krycek was about his work. He'd been very impressed with the young agent's work so far. He was very eager, but he had potential. He and Mulder worked well together, which was saying a lot. Skinner thought back to a time when he'd been just that enthusiastic about his job. But the politics and bureaucracy had quickly disillusioned him. He accepted that now he was just waiting on retirement, his ambition a thing of the past.
Krycek interrupted his reverie. "Hello, sir. I didn't expect to see you here."
"Assistant Directors have to eat, too, Agent Krycek," Skinner said, with more force than he'd intended.
Krycek blushed and stammered, "I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean . . . "
Skinner sighed again. "My fault, Krycek. It's been a rough day. You're looking for dinner, too, I guess. I was planning on steak. What about you?"
"I don't really cook, I was just going to get a frozen dinner and nuke it."
On impulse, Skinner said, "That's not really healthy, Krycek. Why don't you let me make you dinner? I'd like to get to know you better."
Krycek looked surprised again, a delightful little crease appearing between his eyes. "I . . . that's kind of you, but I'm not sure . . . I mean - - "
"I'd like the company. If you'd rather not, though . . ."
"Well, if you're sure you don't mind . . ."
"I wouldn't have asked you if I did. Do you want to follow me to my place?"
"Let me get another steak and we'll be ready."
Fifteen minutes later, Skinner was letting Krycek into his apartment.
"Come on in, get comfortable. Let's go to the kitchen, and I'll get dinner started while you tell me about yourself."
Skinner put the groceries down and opened the refrigerator.
"What can I get you? Beer?"
"Yeah, that'd be good."
"So, tell me about yourself. What made you choose the FBI?" Skinner asked as he started dinner.
Krycek looked uncomfortable. "Well, I guess I've always wanted to do this, to help people, the whole justice for all thing. I'm sure that's probably something like why you got into it."
Skinner looked surprised. "Why do you say that?"
"Well, you have a reputation for being that way. And Mulder speaks very highly of you."
"And is that all they say about me?"
"Well, and that you're sort of a . . ."
Krycek blushed. "That you're . . . um . . . tough but fair."
"That was diplomatic. You'll do well in this job, I'm sure."
Krycek smiled ruefully. "Sorry, sir."
"We're not at work. Call me Walter. And I'm aware of what people say about me. I used to be more . . . excited by what I do. Lately, I just feel like I'm . . . stuck in quicksand, like I'm not really accomplishing anything."
"Call me Alex. And if you don't mind me saying, Walter, you should be proud of what you've accomplished. People may think you're tough, but they respect you."
"Thank you, Alex," Skinner said sincerely.
"So, did you grow up here?"
"No. I was born in Texas. My dad was career military, so we moved. A lot."
"That was rough," Krycek said, not a question.
"Yeah. New schools, new friends all the time. And I was an only child."
"Me, too. It got sort of lonely."
"Yes," Skinner agreed. "Would you mind eating in here instead of the dining room?"
Krycek grinned. "No, I don't mind. In fact, I usually eat in the living room, in front of the TV."
The conversation dragged as Krycek got up to set the table and Skinner finished preparing their dinner.
"This is good, Walter," Krycek said as he took a bite of steak.
"Thank you," Skinner said absently. Krycek had taken off his jacket and Skinner could see more clearly just how sexy he really was. Not muscular, he had a lean sexiness that made Skinner want to see more of that body.
"- a lot?"
"I'm sorry, Alex, what?"
"I said, do you cook a lot?"
"On the weekends mostly. I enjoy it, and I hate eating out all the time."
"I know. Me, too," Krycek said, nose crinkling as he smiled, making Skinner smile, too.
"I didn't make dessert, but I have chocolate cake, and pecan pie. What would you like?"
"Chocolate cake, please."
Skinner chose pecan pie. Krycek took a bite of his cake and closed his eyes. "Umm, that's good."
"Can't take credit for that. I got it at a bakery."
When Skinner got up to clear the table, Krycek insisted on helping. After the dishes were rinsed and placed in the dishwasher, they took their coffee to the living room.
"I appreciate you inviting me for dinner, Walter. It was nice."
"I'm glad you agreed to come. I've noticed you at work. You have a lot of potential. And you seem to be able to handle Mulder. Which is no small feat."
Krycek laughed, a delightfully husky sound. "I like working with Mulder. It's a challenge at times, but he's very good at what he does."
"Yes, he is." Skinner thought of the two of them together, so young and sexy and alive. It made him realize he was kidding himself that Krycek could want him.
"Um, Walter, did I say something wrong? You look . . ."
"Once again, not your fault, Alex. I was just thinking of something unpleasant."
"So, what do you like to do when you're not working? Hobbies?"
"Well, I'm a big hockey fan, and I like to read, and I jog."
"I box, and I work out."
"I can tell you work out. You have a great body." Krycek gasped. "I mean, ah, you, ah, I can tell you take care of yourself," he said, blushing furiously.
"Thank you, Alex," Skinner said.
"I - - ah - - I should go now," Alex said as he stood and grabbed his jacket.
Skinner got up. "Wait, Alex," he said, putting his hand on Krycek's arm. "Please, don't go. I'm enjoying your company."
"I shouldn't have come. I tried to tell myself to just say no, but I couldn't. And now, being here with you . . . I have to go," Krycek moaned, pulling away.
"Alex, what are you saying?"
Krycek stopped, looking horrified. "I didn't mean - - I'm sorry."
"Alex, I asked you here on impulse, but I'm not sorry I did. And I didn't do it for all the right reasons. I should be apologizing to you. I'm your boss, and I should know better."
"Are you saying you're attracted to me?" Krycek asked, stunned.
"God, yes, Alex!"
"I never imagined you would feel the same. I don't know what . . . oh, hell," Alex said, going to kiss Skinner. He was surprised, but recovered quickly and returned the kiss. Then they were frantically unbuttoning each other's shirts, desperate for contact.
"Alex, come upstairs with me?" Skinner asked. He saw Krycek hesitate. "It's all right if you - -"
"Yes, I'll go upstairs with you."
Once in Skinner's bedroom, they became even more frantic, almost tearing at each other's clothes. They licked and sucked and touched until Krycek pulled back to ask, "Fuck me now?"
Skinner's eyes went dark with desire as he said roughly, "Oh, yes."
Skinner went to the bathroom for condoms and lube. When he turned back, Krycek was in bed, on his knees. He felt his legs go weak.
"Jesus, Alex, you're gorgeous. I knew you would be."
Krycek looked up at him, green eyes glittering. "I knew you would be, too," he said, eyes raking over Skinner as his tongue darted out to lick at his lips.
"Alex, would you turn over for me? I want to see you."
Skinner got them ready and positioned himself, slowly easing into Krycek's tight ass.
"Alex," he gasped.
"Come on, Walter, that's so good," Krycek panted.
Skinner pushed forward until he was in all the way, and Krycek said, "So good," again.
Skinner fucked him hard and fast, neither of them able to hold out long. They lay side by side, afterwards, panting, waiting for their hearts to slow down.
Krycek spoke first. "That was . . . unbelievable. I refuse to regret it."
"But?" Skinner said, keeping the hurt out of his voice.
"I shouldn't have let it happen. There's things you don't know about me, Walter. Things that could hurt you."
"Same here, Alex."
Krycek shook his head. "Not the same. I can't make you any promises. I can't commit to anything."
"I won't ask you for more than you're able to give. If I can accept that, are you willing to try?"
Skinner pulled Krycek into his arms.
"Can you spend the night? I'd like to wake up with you here."
"I'd like that."
Website: Website: http://www.cruelhaven.org/maddie/index.html
Feedback: Yes, please.
Warnings: This story contains m/m sexual relationship.
Spoilers: Not really. Set circa the Sleepless period.
Archive: Full House, RatB, DIB, WWOMB. All others, just ask.
Disclaimer: All X-Files characters belong to Chris Carter and 1013 Productions. No copyright infringement is intended and no money is being made.
Summary: What if things could have been different?
Notes: Written for Peja's challenge using "(Insert Name) wasn't thinking about sex when...." As the opening line. Unbeta'd, so enter at your own risk.
First Published: July 31, 2003
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